58 What if I really don’t know what I want?
by Una Hearne.
What if you just don’t know what you want? What if you’re not sure who you really are? Lots of people will say you need to know the answers but then can’t tell you how to figure it all out.
These are key questions, you can’t go after what you want if you don’t know what that is. And you can’t know what you really want if you don’t know who you are and what makes you happy.
I specialise in this area because I could never resist the big questions. I have developed methods of helping people to get really clear about who they are and what they want, based on sound coaching principles. The most fundamental principle is that you do know what’s best for you. You do know the answers for yourself, everyone does. Coaching helps people access their own wisdom.
I am not claiming my approach is the only way or the best way. I believe in the world of personal development it is most useful to explore many approaches, theories and models and use what works for you. Ignore the rest for the moment, they are not wrong or invalid, just not for you now. The trick is to remain open and curious.
The core process I use to help people create a vision for their work or their whole life is this:
- Figure out what matters most to you. I use questions to draw out your values which gives you a good idea of who you really are.
- Next I use questions to uncover all you have to offer. We forget, or take for granted, most of what we have achieved or bring to the world, so this takes some work to bring back to consciousness.
- Then creating a Vision. This means a picture or description of how you want you life to be at a specific point in the future. You know most of it already (yes really, you do1), it’s just buried and needs to be brought out.
The process I use is straightforward in concept as you can see, the only complexity is added by the fact that each of us is a unique human being. So yes, not that straightforward in practice :-). The journey is unique for each person. It can be easy or difficult, it can take a long time or a short time, it can be enjoyable or slightly painful – it is always worth it and anyone can do it. Anyone can create a vision (or goal, plan, outcome, mission…) for any aspect of their life, or their whole life, and move forward positively and confidently.
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