Una's Blog


Happiness 17 Where happiness comes from

by Una Hearne.

This is another tricky area in the manifesting of Visions (goals, dreams, plans, aims – whatever your having yourself). Happiness is far more about your internal world than external circumstances. If it was about external circumstances then everyone who has the things you think you need to be happy would be deliriously happy. Right? Yet they are often miserable. So the idea ‘I’ll be happy when I have – {insert desire here} – is a trap.

But hang on Una, isn’t that the whole reason we create Visions? To make ourselves happy? Yes of course but here’s the thing – if all of your happiness depends on a Vision or goal manifesting – what are you feeling while you are getting there? Lack of the things you want? Misery? Fear? What if your Vision doesn’t work out the way you wanted – are you condemned to feel disappointment and failure forever?

Here’s a few things I’ve noticed over the years:

  • People who don’t know how to feel happy now – also don’t know how to feel happy when their Vision becomes a reality.
  • Most of our lives are made up of the journey not the destinations reached along the way. If you can only be happy at the destination points….
  • We are generally more successful in achieving our dreams when we are happy enough where we are. Or, if our circumstances are truly awful, at least accepting of where we are. Because that frees up our energy.
  • People who chase and manifest Vision and goals which are not authentically right for them – experience all of the disappointment and emptiness they feared from failure. I’ve coached people who have made millions, got the perfect job or mate and it didn’t make them happy.

Hang on Una, if I were happy with my life as it is, I wouldn’t bother trying to achieve anything!

Really? Have you checked? There is no contradiction between being happy right now and wanting more and better. In fact operating from a place of happiness/contentment means far less stress and far more likely you will achieve what you set out to.

It is your ability to find happiness every day – given whatever circumstances you find yourself in – which really dictates your level of happiness. And I speak as a person who has life long clinical depression so I know this is possible with practice. Most of the time.

So what about when bad things happen, are we supposed to find happiness in these? No, not at first, it is natural and important to feel the sadness, anger or fear in some situations. It’s about whether you allow yourself to feel these emotions as they arise and let them pass naturally or whether you get stuck in them. When I relapsed with ME, I had a very hard time coming to terms with it. It wasn’t a pretty process but it meant that I haven’t ended up bitter or depressed overall. My life is severely limited in some ways but I have a ton of things to be happy about as well. I choose to focus more on the happy things.

The bad news is what happens in your head is largely up to you – BOO! Sorry.

The good news is what happens in your head is largely up to you – YAY! Your welcome. 🙂



Pic credit: Activedia  Found on: pixabay

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