Una’s little world 9. The Status Trap
by Una Hearne.
In a break from me and M.E., (was that a hallelujah from the chorus?)(Rude!). I want to talk about limiting beliefs, specifically, beliefs around status.
Two people I know – pioneers and my heroes – were successful business owners and professionals. The recession brought an end to both businesses some years ago. Both people felt at a loose end for a while and then both took jobs well below what would be perceived as their former status and abilities. It is the equivalent of a doctor retiring after 30 years of practice and taking a part time job in a newsagents. Notice your reaction to that.
So, should we pity my two heroes? As we habitually do – assuming reduced status is a sad thing. We imagine the former sports star or one hit wonder pop star living a miserable life after their fame. ‘Oh how the mighty have fallen’ we lament, secretly pleased we no longer feel inadequate by comparison. We hold the belief that the end of one successful part of our life means failure, loss and unhappiness. What if this belief is… well, horseshit? What if the belief that a step to lower status is a bad thing, actually keeps thousands of people shackled to a treadmill which is killing them slowly?
Look closer. My two heroes gave themselves the freedom to choose what is right for them in their lives now. Both had enjoyed their previous work but had no real desire to go back to it. They wanted something different. Both found they love their new jobs. They love having far lower levels of stress and responsibility. Their income meets their needs, which is all they want at the moment. They are revelling in the new range of social contact, and the freedom and flexibility they have working part-time. Both heroes also add huge value to their employers because of their previous experience. Because they are acknowledged and thanked for this they are happy to give and don’t feel exploited. Both realise status is a nice ego trip, but it’s not important. It certainly doesn’t make decent people assholes or vice versa. And because they made this move so successfully they are more likely to continue to make the best choices for themselves and find it increasingly easy to start something new.
Pity them? I think not!
No, indeed we should pay attention and learn from their example. Breaking down barriers to happiness is heroic. Common barriers like limiting beliefs are created in our minds and can only be broken in our minds. You are the person who can gift yourself the freedom to make the right choices for you. So when you spot a belief which is holding you back in your life, just ask yourself ‘Is this really true?’ Really?
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